Conflicting Feelings!

It's been a while since posting, and I just thought I should write something. Being that it's the holiday season things get busy in our household. With two boys dreaming of race cars, trains and Christmas trees it gets harder to concentrate on my movie endeavors. I'm still writing, and experimenting, but time is at a premium. Also I haven't been too happy in the quality of my writing, so maybe there lies the crux of the problem. I've already come to realize that in order for me to make another film it is going to take some time for me to pull it off, and if I'm going to spend a lot of time on a film it better be a GOOD one, and something worth saying. In essence it better mean something to me. Money is also a factor, but more importantly its about what I want to say. Life is too short, and I want my boys to look at my films someday and maybe get a clue on who I am or was. Of course it's hard. Film is a collaborative venture, but it takes just one man or women to start the wheels of production. The auteur theory has its place, but one man or women cannot make a film entirely by him or herself, so that person needs to generate interest and a certain amount of spirit in their project. How else can you get volunteers to work on your film for nothing or next to nothing.

You have to believe in the project so it's all on you at first, and since it takes a while to make a film with the limitations we set for ourselves or that are forced upon ourselves we need to make the film a GOOD film. One that when you look back at the making of the film you won't regret your time spent on it.

That's where I'm at now. We'll see how it all turns out, but hopefully something good is going to happen. I just need to remember that it's my LOVE for film making that drives me not my desire to be famous or wealthy. After all I have stories to tell, and it's all about storytelling.